sex in your snuggie

Okay so something that I can’t believe I missed has come to my attention just now.  So you know those lame Snuggie things that have taken off?… I don’t know why but apparently either there are a lot of gag gifts going around these days or a lot more idiots.  Well the recent Snuggie sales has created a sudden surge in “Snuggie related ideas”… such as the Twosome Snuggie I wrote about last year.  Well resident bad-ass Lex Friedman jumped on the band wagon and created a website called The Snuggie Sutra… yeah, it’s exactly what you think it is…

The tag line of the Snuggie Sutra website is: “You have a Snuggie, you have sex, this was inevitable.”  I’m just taking a stab in the dark here but I don’t think a lot of people who own Snuggies are having a lot of sex… but either way it’s pretty hilarious and a pretty sweet idea.  This is how Lex describes how The Snuggie Sutra guide was born:

Sex is fun.  Blankets are a pain in the ass.  You know how it is.  You and your lover are in bed, eager to engage in coitus, orgasmic ecstasy easily within reach.  But the blankets get tangled.  Or tossed aside.  She gets cold.  He gets shrinkage.  There’s never been a solution to having sex while avoiding a chill.  Until the Snuggie.  The Snuggie Sutra is like the Kama Sutra, only with Snuggies.  It’s an illustrated guide to sexual positions that are both erotic and warm.

Awesome!  I would trade in a couple of my friends to bring this guy into my inner circle… not because of his Snuggie Sutra knowledge or anything, but because he seems a lot funnier than most of the people I hang out with.

Not only are the illustrations easy to understand but the explanations are even better!  For instance to do The Tablecloth (at the top of this page): She lies on the table.  He wears the Snuggie on his front while the bottom end covers her.  It’s just not a holiday without stuffing. Now that is brilliant!

So if you own a Snuggie (but I pray you don’t) and you have a partner (which you probably won’t)… but in case you do… I recommend you go to the Snuggie Sutra website and check out some of their moves… or add your own!

Cheers!

jordenf

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the ultimate in office warfare

Have you ever wrapped a rubber band around your finger and shot it at a coworker or a friend while sitting around the office or school?  Well Bryce Bell just stepped it up to another level.  He has created a company called Cardnetics which is where he sells his business cards that double as killing devices… well they may not kill but they could seriously take someone’s eye out if you’re not careful.

His first card, the Cardapult, is a business card that transforms into a catapult so you can nail Nancy (and not in the good way) who is always bragging about the Johnson Account by the water cooler.

Bell’s new prototype is the not as creatively named Penny Shooter, which could definitely take out a rodent on the loose in the warehouse or probably a small toddler that your secretary thought would be okay to bring in with her because she is only working a quick afternoon shift.  Put THAT on your extended employee health benefits plan!

You can get the cards printed with your business name, email, phone number and all that jazz but I think they are probably more designed as a promotional item giveaway and not a card you would hand over to the CEO of a multimillion dollar company that you are bidding on a contract for.  Still pretty cool though!

Cheers,

jordenf

You can check out both the Cardapult and Penny Shooter on my Flickr Feed.

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the return of duck hunt

Obviously you remember the awesomeness that was the original Duck Hunt for Nintendo.  Well while you dream of an updated version possibly coming out for the Nintendo Wii I’ve got something that you might like even more.

Duck Hunter Extreme is a real life (well as close as you can get to real without killing an actual animal) duck hunting game where one person flies the duck via remote control and the other person tries to shoot it down.

It does lose a little something without the blood-hound running into the grass to pick up your collection of ducks… I also wonder how long the remote ducks will last after getting capped and crashing a bunch of times.  Still looks sweet though.  You can only get the game through a 3rd party like Amazon.com who have it for $55US if you are looking for a post-Christmas present for yourself.

Cheers!

jordenf

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new balance 686 snowboard boot

I love New Balance runners.  I currently run on the New Balance 769 shoe and I’ve always said that if Jesus didn’t fly everywhere he would run in these shoes.  My snowboard boots (made by Burton) on the other hand (or foot I guess) make my feet feel as if Godzilla blew fire on my toes and then Mothra hit my heels with one of her poison darts.  Soooo you can imagine the party I threw when I heard that New Balance’s snowboard clothing line 686 decided to come out with a limited edition snowboard boot called the Times NB 580 based after their already popular MT580 sneaker.

The Times NB 580 comes in black or white and look like they couldn’t get more comfortable unless they were lined with baby seal pelts.  Here are some specs on the boots from New Balance’s 686 website:

Based upon the original MT580 sneaker, the 686 design team recreated a fully functional, technically advanced snowboard boot with a sneaker-like fit. The intense process utilized New Balance’s proprietary features like Rollbar and Abzorb, as well as combining BOA’s proven Focus lacing system. The end result is a true masterpiece of New Balance’s quality footwear heritage and 686’s technical snowboarding history.

Basically that’s a lot of fancy language for “they feel awesome and have a lot of cool stuff inside them”.  I also noticed that they have these neat dials on the tongue and on the side of the boot… maybe they are volume knobs to turn up the good and turn down the suck?  I think it might have something to do with the BOA Focus lacing system where you don’t actually lace up anything but rather tighten by twisting the dials… so even an idiot or someone with only one hand can tie them up tightly now!

Snowboard season is already underway so I probably wont try to pick these up until it winds down in April as the $300US price tag is a little high for me.   I’m hoping it will drop a bit after the initial launch.  Looks like another season of wearing my Burton Godzilla/Mothra hybrid boots for now.

Cheers!

jordenf

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dino chopsticks

Do you like eating and dinosaurs?  Well I know I do!  And now you can have the best of both worlds with Dino Sticks!

I’m pretty sure these are meant for kids and you might look like a bit of a tool by using chopsticks that are glued together at the top, but at least all the boys between the ages of 4-11 will think your cool.  They come in all different kinds including T-Rex, Stegosaurus, Velociraptor, and my personal favourite the Brontosaurus ( I guess the folks at Dino Sticks don’t read my blog so they don’t realize that the Brontosaurus isn’t really a dinosaur).

I do like that the packaging states it “makes finger food more tasty”.  Yes cause nothing makes finger food more tasty than a little Bisphenol A leaching into your fish sticks from your plastic dinosaur shaped chopsticks.

I’m not going to lie these things are pretty bad-ass and as a lover of dinosaurs for only $2 I might be tempted to buy a set.

Cheers!

jordenf

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